Elsie, tonight you told me you were afraid of the dark. "Me scared dark, momma." I kissed the palm of each of your sweet little hands and told you that when you got scared to use momma's kisses- to press them to your cheek. You held onto those kisses so very tight. You are a busy girl and into everything but I adore you, so so much.
My sweet Grace, you have found your toes! Your feet are your new favorite toy. This has to be one of the cutest milestones. I got out the 6-9 month jammies for you today. You are growing so fast, my beautiful girl. I rocked you as I nursed you and you were so sleepy- like the new baby girl I brought home from the hospital not so long ago. I want to memorize your sweet baby smell and the weight of you in my arms.
You are so loved, my babies.
Tuesday, February 16, 2016
Grace Jean
We are so very in love with our Grace Jean who arrived on January 30th! I thought I was carrying a big baby, but was still surprised when they weighed her in at 8 pounds 15 oz, and measured at 22.5 inches long- but very proud. My labor was short and fierce with this one! I got out of the shower Saturday morning and noticed I was bleeding. I started to majorly panic because I didn't know if I was just going into labor ( 5 days past my due date) or if something was wrong. I called my dr and all she said was "It's time to go to the hospital!" I quickly got off the phone and we called Elliott's mom over to take care of my Elsie. I started to tear up, I was so panicked but I wanted to stay strong for her and for her to feel secure as we said goodbye. We took off in the car and I started to google what bleeding this late in the game could mean and it was horrifying. I put my phone away as it was being blown up with well meaning family members wanted updates. I wanted an update! We made it to the hospital and they thought I might have a tear in my placenta & since I was already dilated to a 3 and had an induction date for the following day, they decided not to wait around and to get baby here asap! I could feel baby kicking and I felt at ease that we were in good hands and that everything would be ok.
They started me on Pitocin right away, and BOY does that stuff work. There was an hour where I felt as though I was going to be in labor FOREVERRR and things picked up so quickly. My contractions started coming HARD and fast. From the time I told the nurse things were getting iffy and we need to get the epidural man over here, to the time that he actually got there, I was in searing pain and holding Elliott's hands so very tight. They weren't sure that there would be enough time for it to take effect before baby got here. Thank goodness it did. Hallelujah!! My last hour of labor was cake before it was time to push. I am not sure exactly how many pushes it took to get here here, but this wasn't my first baby and I knew heck of a lot better what to do. I was so much more motivated to push more effectively and I remember asking "is she out yet!?" I knew when she was and I was much more with it than I was with Elsie. I remember them telling me she had lots of hair and that she was big and when they placed her on my chest I was just completely enamored. I remember Elsie's wide eyes when they laid her on my chest and her screaming but Grace didn't like the bright lights and kept her eyes closed. She had the longest fingers and fingernails!! I was on a post birth high holding my sweet babe and filled with so much energy. I could walk after my epidural and even though it was shaky I was so happy because I had been rendered so helpless last time with Elsie loosing too much blood and whatnot. From my first contractions getting her here took 5 ish hours. Our hospital experience was so much smoother because we knew the drill and we have done the newborn thing before. It was really peaceful and even though we were exhausted I really loved that time to just have nothing on my to do list but snuggle and nurse my new baby girl!
to be continueeeeddddd
They started me on Pitocin right away, and BOY does that stuff work. There was an hour where I felt as though I was going to be in labor FOREVERRR and things picked up so quickly. My contractions started coming HARD and fast. From the time I told the nurse things were getting iffy and we need to get the epidural man over here, to the time that he actually got there, I was in searing pain and holding Elliott's hands so very tight. They weren't sure that there would be enough time for it to take effect before baby got here. Thank goodness it did. Hallelujah!! My last hour of labor was cake before it was time to push. I am not sure exactly how many pushes it took to get here here, but this wasn't my first baby and I knew heck of a lot better what to do. I was so much more motivated to push more effectively and I remember asking "is she out yet!?" I knew when she was and I was much more with it than I was with Elsie. I remember them telling me she had lots of hair and that she was big and when they placed her on my chest I was just completely enamored. I remember Elsie's wide eyes when they laid her on my chest and her screaming but Grace didn't like the bright lights and kept her eyes closed. She had the longest fingers and fingernails!! I was on a post birth high holding my sweet babe and filled with so much energy. I could walk after my epidural and even though it was shaky I was so happy because I had been rendered so helpless last time with Elsie loosing too much blood and whatnot. From my first contractions getting her here took 5 ish hours. Our hospital experience was so much smoother because we knew the drill and we have done the newborn thing before. It was really peaceful and even though we were exhausted I really loved that time to just have nothing on my to do list but snuggle and nurse my new baby girl!
to be continueeeeddddd
Saturday, January 16, 2016
On being a mother
I have loved you for always.
Long before your first kicks or coos.
You were always mine
From the days when you were just a dream baby
I loved you when you grew inside my tummy
Even when you left deep stretch marks on my side
If that is what I had to pay for you, then of course it was worth it
If you could see my heart- it would probably look the same
Stretched beyond capacity
With all my love
And also pain
Because you're sad is my sad
And with how much my love grows for you each day it's also torn
by how quickly each day goes by
I rock you and sing to you before bed
Feeling already that I will miss this very much someday
For this is what I was meant to be-
a mother
Long before your first kicks or coos.
You were always mine
From the days when you were just a dream baby
I loved you when you grew inside my tummy
Even when you left deep stretch marks on my side
If that is what I had to pay for you, then of course it was worth it
If you could see my heart- it would probably look the same
Stretched beyond capacity
With all my love
And also pain
Because you're sad is my sad
And with how much my love grows for you each day it's also torn
by how quickly each day goes by
I rock you and sing to you before bed
Feeling already that I will miss this very much someday
For this is what I was meant to be-
a mother
39 weeks.
Baby girl the second is showing no signs of busting a move on out of my womb anytime soon. She is very comfy in there, as opposed to myself out here carrying her. I have somewhat lost control of both my bladder and emotions. The last days are such a waiting game! However, I have settled in and have just become contented with the fact that I will go past my due date like with Elsie Lou. I am just so very excited to meet her and for her to join our family!!!! This pregnancy has been SO DIFFERENT. For starters- I never retained water like I did with miss E. I retained A TON of water with that lovey child. At this point I have gained about 20 pounds less than I did the first time. Also Elsie was a large beach ball shape, and this baby is more watermelon. She is all out front!! People would leap out of their way in my first pregnancy to open doors and grab me shopping carts. This time people often are talking to me and then say "Oh I didn't realize you were pregnant!" That isn't to say that all people feel this way- I still have had my fair share of tactless comments aimed my way. There is no escaping it in pregnancy though! Either you are too big or too small- It doesn't matter. Someone will have an opinion and decide it's their job to share it with you. My carpal tunnel and sleepless nights have been fewer. I attribute most of these changes to chasing around Lou all day! I am constantly on the go this time and am probably eating better since I make sure Lou eats well throughout the day. I am trying to stay busy and trying to make my days count, rather than counting my days. Here's to our soon to be family of four!!!
OH! And a binky free update for Lou- to anyone who wonders if there is light at the end of the dark tunnel of pacifier-free doom. THERE IS. And it took two weeks of the hardest days of my life to get us there. I truly truly struggled knowing whether or not I was doing the right thing. I just kept on thinking of that quote that goes something to the tune of, " the temptation to quit will be greatest right before you see success", and we were already too far down the rabbit hole to turn back. I have my happy girl back, she sleeps better than she ever did with it, and get this- SHE DOESN'T EVEN ASK FOR IT! So there. You can do hard things, too. I have learned so many lessons with miss Lou I feel so much more prepared for baby on the way. Sorry, first child, the learning curve has been impressive.I think the biggest lesson though is that motherhood is tough, and nobody has it all figured out. It's not for the faint of heart, this parenting stuff, because it takes your entire heart, and then some.
OH! And a binky free update for Lou- to anyone who wonders if there is light at the end of the dark tunnel of pacifier-free doom. THERE IS. And it took two weeks of the hardest days of my life to get us there. I truly truly struggled knowing whether or not I was doing the right thing. I just kept on thinking of that quote that goes something to the tune of, " the temptation to quit will be greatest right before you see success", and we were already too far down the rabbit hole to turn back. I have my happy girl back, she sleeps better than she ever did with it, and get this- SHE DOESN'T EVEN ASK FOR IT! So there. You can do hard things, too. I have learned so many lessons with miss Lou I feel so much more prepared for baby on the way. Sorry, first child, the learning curve has been impressive.I think the biggest lesson though is that motherhood is tough, and nobody has it all figured out. It's not for the faint of heart, this parenting stuff, because it takes your entire heart, and then some.
Thursday, December 31, 2015
binky rehab
In short, Lou's' love for her stinkin' bink was getting out of hand, and something needed to be done. I put it off and put it off, because let's face it, binks comfort parents as much as they do babes- leaving home without a bink in my diaper bag felt akin to leaping out of a plane with no parachute. After reading several articles on pinterest, I chose to have her help me gather them up into a gift bag. We left them out on the porch and Elliott ran around the house, chucked the binks and filled the bag with some m &m's and a note from the mysterious binky fairy. That was almost three days ago.
There came a time in binky rehab when I found myself trying to lure my wild lou girl out from behind a couch with a bowl of ice cream ,that, my job felt more like wild animal tamer than loving mother. Especially after that failed and I ended up tossing a blanket over her like a net and swaddling her up tight in hopes of calming the bear ( have you ever tried to swaddle an almost two year old?? for the record this pretty much worked) And this is only because I took the binky at the same time that she is cutting her 2 year molars, which is possibly the worst time I could have chosen, ever. Mother of the year over here! It is times like this when I crawl into bed with a heavy heart knowing I will be woken up in few hours by a sad babe that I think " I have no idea what I am doing whatsoever." Because while there are hundreds of articles of getting rid of pacifiers ( trust me, I have read them), there are none on getting rid of pacifiers from Elsie Lou, and what to do when I can't get her to eat anything and she goes into a low blood sugar rage and wakes up in the night demanding that she have a bow in her hair right then and there and doesn't go back to sleep for 2 hours. Because no babe is the same and no momma is the same. I have the doting mother thing down, but tough love is not something that I came equipped with. I just have to resign myself to a quote I pinned the other day that says "The fact that you worry about being a good mother means you already are one". I hope it's true because I sure tell myself this a lot. I certainly feel best on the days where I can get by without any Curious George involved and she eats well rounded meals on cute little sectioned plates and the dishes get done before I pass out from it all- but we have to get real sometimes. As real as my acid reflux and 36 week pregnant waddle. Right?! Here is to ringing in the new year with hopes of being over the bink for good ( because right now I think we all have ptsd and could use some family counseling ( insert sobbing emoji)) making our family of three a family of four, and surviving a little better next year than I did this year. Maybe even some thriving involved!! Here's to you mommas of littles, who are choosing to spend your twenties in what so some might seem pretty un-fancy- but is in fact the most important thing we will ever do or could do. Mom power! ( I don't know when this turned from a self deprecating saga of binky loss into a pep talk but I appreciate it all the same)
Happy New Year! May we all go down a yoga pants size and get a full nights rest.
There came a time in binky rehab when I found myself trying to lure my wild lou girl out from behind a couch with a bowl of ice cream ,that, my job felt more like wild animal tamer than loving mother. Especially after that failed and I ended up tossing a blanket over her like a net and swaddling her up tight in hopes of calming the bear ( have you ever tried to swaddle an almost two year old?? for the record this pretty much worked) And this is only because I took the binky at the same time that she is cutting her 2 year molars, which is possibly the worst time I could have chosen, ever. Mother of the year over here! It is times like this when I crawl into bed with a heavy heart knowing I will be woken up in few hours by a sad babe that I think " I have no idea what I am doing whatsoever." Because while there are hundreds of articles of getting rid of pacifiers ( trust me, I have read them), there are none on getting rid of pacifiers from Elsie Lou, and what to do when I can't get her to eat anything and she goes into a low blood sugar rage and wakes up in the night demanding that she have a bow in her hair right then and there and doesn't go back to sleep for 2 hours. Because no babe is the same and no momma is the same. I have the doting mother thing down, but tough love is not something that I came equipped with. I just have to resign myself to a quote I pinned the other day that says "The fact that you worry about being a good mother means you already are one". I hope it's true because I sure tell myself this a lot. I certainly feel best on the days where I can get by without any Curious George involved and she eats well rounded meals on cute little sectioned plates and the dishes get done before I pass out from it all- but we have to get real sometimes. As real as my acid reflux and 36 week pregnant waddle. Right?! Here is to ringing in the new year with hopes of being over the bink for good ( because right now I think we all have ptsd and could use some family counseling ( insert sobbing emoji)) making our family of three a family of four, and surviving a little better next year than I did this year. Maybe even some thriving involved!! Here's to you mommas of littles, who are choosing to spend your twenties in what so some might seem pretty un-fancy- but is in fact the most important thing we will ever do or could do. Mom power! ( I don't know when this turned from a self deprecating saga of binky loss into a pep talk but I appreciate it all the same)
Happy New Year! May we all go down a yoga pants size and get a full nights rest.
Thursday, December 17, 2015
dear 21 month old
Dear Elsie Lou,
You are 21 months old. I am not okay with how quickly you are growing up, but I couldn't be more proud of you. You have the biggest heart, and your hugs and "I wuv woo's" fill my heart to overflowing. You are bright and determined, you are passionate and funny. You love an audience and feed off the energy of large gatherings. In church you like to open the hymn book and lead the music yourself, flipping through each page. You love to wrap up your babies and take such sweet care of them, I know you will be the best big sister. Our most read book is Curious George and the puppies. You love to go for walks and to be outdoors. In the bathtub you like to sing songs with me, you love book of Mormon stories. You like to take me by the hand and pull me to whatever activity you are working on and need me to join in. You still love to be held. Now when I sing you a song before bed, you sing along the words you know. I could kiss your chubby cheeks all day and I hope you always keep your hand dimples. You are generally very well behaved when we are out and about and you make things fun and silly. You finally will stay and play in nursery, even though I still check on you frequently, peeking in through window to see how you are doing. It's hard for me to let other people take care of you. You have recently gone from calling me "momma" to "mommy" and "dada" to "daddy". It makes you sound so grown up. If I ask you if you are a baby or tot you tell me " TOT!" with a surety. We like to play music during the day and you like to grab my hands and say "dance!" I am so very very grateful to be your mother, it is my greatest joy, and you are the greatest little person.
Love,
Momma
You are 21 months old. I am not okay with how quickly you are growing up, but I couldn't be more proud of you. You have the biggest heart, and your hugs and "I wuv woo's" fill my heart to overflowing. You are bright and determined, you are passionate and funny. You love an audience and feed off the energy of large gatherings. In church you like to open the hymn book and lead the music yourself, flipping through each page. You love to wrap up your babies and take such sweet care of them, I know you will be the best big sister. Our most read book is Curious George and the puppies. You love to go for walks and to be outdoors. In the bathtub you like to sing songs with me, you love book of Mormon stories. You like to take me by the hand and pull me to whatever activity you are working on and need me to join in. You still love to be held. Now when I sing you a song before bed, you sing along the words you know. I could kiss your chubby cheeks all day and I hope you always keep your hand dimples. You are generally very well behaved when we are out and about and you make things fun and silly. You finally will stay and play in nursery, even though I still check on you frequently, peeking in through window to see how you are doing. It's hard for me to let other people take care of you. You have recently gone from calling me "momma" to "mommy" and "dada" to "daddy". It makes you sound so grown up. If I ask you if you are a baby or tot you tell me " TOT!" with a surety. We like to play music during the day and you like to grab my hands and say "dance!" I am so very very grateful to be your mother, it is my greatest joy, and you are the greatest little person.
Love,
Momma
Monday, October 5, 2015
binkaholics & pregnancy the second
I am sitting here on the couch with a grateful heart and tiny baby feet kicking away in my stomach. Conference was just what I needed this weekend to give me some fresh perspective on motherhood. While diaper changes and kissing ouches and reading stories might seem trivial to some, it's the most important job and I'm not ashamed to say that it brings my heart the truest kind of joy. I am tired, but happy, overwhelmed at times, but very happy with the things that I am blessed to be overwhelmed with. Motherhood is the most sacred calling and I feel so very humbled to be pregnant a second time, with a second little girl. I feel like I love her so much already because I know how much I love my Elsie Lou.
I knew I was pregnant this time, before any test knew. In fact the tests said, you're crazy! But my body knew otherwise. It was the strangest thing, I just felt pregnant. When I finally got a positive test I was so relieved and happy! And then obvs I took 2 tests more just to be triple sure. We hadn't planned this pregnancy but I don't think the timing could be any better. I loved this person right from the start. At 7 ish weeks I thought we had lost the baby. I had a lot of cramping one night, which I had to work so very hard not to worry over, but the next day there was lots of blood. I was a mess. I was devastated. But then it just stopped. I had to wait the longest weekend of my life for blood tests to confirm that my hcg level was still rising, and it was. I tried not to get my hopes up until an ultrasound at 8 weeks, where I saw that tiny little baby and got to hear that tiny little heart beating. My heart hurts for mommas everywhere who don't have the same outcome. I was cautious with my excitement after that, but I have decided I can't let my fears get in the way of being happy an enjoying this pregnancy! The dr.'s say everything looks healthy and good!
This time around, despite my early concerns has been a lot less stressful. I was in school and student teaching when I was pregnancy with Elsie and I really struggled. She was born with little wrinkles on her forehead hich I attributed to all of my worries. This time, I know there is absolutely nothing I can do besides have faith and pray! And there is comfort in that. Once you convince your mind of that, there is a lot of peace. You just have to enjoy each day.
This pregnancy has been very different than the first time around! for starters, I don't have the dark line running up the center of my tummy. I thought it would never go away, and now I can't even tell where it was. I was throwing up sick with my Elsie girl till 20 weeks, this time just until 13 or 14, with the occasional nauseas morning here and there. It was a lot easier to be sick the first time! It really scared Els and she would cry and there were even a few times she even slammed the toilet lid on my head! You can't wallow with a toddler, you just have to brush your teeth and keep going! That unless brushing your teeth makes you sick, too! Which sadly, for me, it did. Direct ticket to puke town. Every. Time. Also, I did not put off maternity clothes. The day my pants got tight around my middle, I busted out the stretch pants. I just want to be comfortable! Comfort first, people.
Now for some Elsie Lou at 19 months talk! No need for a smooth transition between topics because uh she is just so stinking amazing. I have mentioned we are all convinced she is the best/most beautiful/smartest little cookie. And the new little antics need to be recorded before they slip my mom brain, like the pitcher of lemonade I found in the pantry, and how I just could not remember how to spell pitcher. There are just so many things! Including her extensive food vocabulary. I am sure every first time parent feels this way, but when she uses a new word in the correct context and says it right, my mind is always blown. Last night I woke up to a tiny voice at 4 am saying "poop! poop!" I walked to her crib in the dark and patted her bum to see if there was indeed a poop- there was not- but her jammies and crib were soaked in pee. Thank you, parents choice diapers. I got her new clothes and a new dipe- left the pee crib for morning ( it's not gross at 4 am) and tucked her into bed with me. She settles down and then puts her face close to mine and says, "toes!" Her toes weren't covered by the blanket. She is just a communicator and works really hard to put her thoughts and feelings into words. Like today she came into the kitchen and said "Help you." I nearly died. It was the cutest thing ever ever, even if it meant dinner took twice as long to make. She says new words everyday. She loves nursery rhymes, her new favorite is "mo mo" which in Elsie means once there was a snow man. She likes ring around the rosey, and she spins around and falls down and demands more and more. She is a girly girl, and often asks for a bow in her hair. She loves to be outside, loves to have stories read to her, loves fruits and veggies, and is currently obsessed with the toilet. I was in the kitchen and she comes in a dumps a cup of water on the floor, I go through my whole "Oh no, lets's clean it up!" mommy business when it hits me that I did not give her the cup of water. I walk to the bathroom- it's soaked. It's toilet water. She was having a ball dumping it all around!! Insert exasperated emoji face. She is doing really well with her glasses, and likes to lift them up, look at you and say "peek a boo!" She is just my sunshine. With the exception of teething days, which are very hard and sad!! She used to be really good at only having a binky for sleep, and I am not sure when it happened but it was a slippery slope to binky addiction and we had a serious binkaholic on our hands. I was truly afraid to dial it back and take it from her! It took a few days to gather the courage, but she is doing so well and only asks for it when she is tired. I think she is much happier not having the silly thing to worry about during the day. This stage is SO MUCH FUN. She is seriously just my tiny pal. She is very affectionate and is so sweet with her baby dolls! I hope it extends to a baby sister. She keeps us laughing, our Elsie Lou. I am so very very grateful I get to be her momma.
I knew I was pregnant this time, before any test knew. In fact the tests said, you're crazy! But my body knew otherwise. It was the strangest thing, I just felt pregnant. When I finally got a positive test I was so relieved and happy! And then obvs I took 2 tests more just to be triple sure. We hadn't planned this pregnancy but I don't think the timing could be any better. I loved this person right from the start. At 7 ish weeks I thought we had lost the baby. I had a lot of cramping one night, which I had to work so very hard not to worry over, but the next day there was lots of blood. I was a mess. I was devastated. But then it just stopped. I had to wait the longest weekend of my life for blood tests to confirm that my hcg level was still rising, and it was. I tried not to get my hopes up until an ultrasound at 8 weeks, where I saw that tiny little baby and got to hear that tiny little heart beating. My heart hurts for mommas everywhere who don't have the same outcome. I was cautious with my excitement after that, but I have decided I can't let my fears get in the way of being happy an enjoying this pregnancy! The dr.'s say everything looks healthy and good!
This time around, despite my early concerns has been a lot less stressful. I was in school and student teaching when I was pregnancy with Elsie and I really struggled. She was born with little wrinkles on her forehead hich I attributed to all of my worries. This time, I know there is absolutely nothing I can do besides have faith and pray! And there is comfort in that. Once you convince your mind of that, there is a lot of peace. You just have to enjoy each day.
This pregnancy has been very different than the first time around! for starters, I don't have the dark line running up the center of my tummy. I thought it would never go away, and now I can't even tell where it was. I was throwing up sick with my Elsie girl till 20 weeks, this time just until 13 or 14, with the occasional nauseas morning here and there. It was a lot easier to be sick the first time! It really scared Els and she would cry and there were even a few times she even slammed the toilet lid on my head! You can't wallow with a toddler, you just have to brush your teeth and keep going! That unless brushing your teeth makes you sick, too! Which sadly, for me, it did. Direct ticket to puke town. Every. Time. Also, I did not put off maternity clothes. The day my pants got tight around my middle, I busted out the stretch pants. I just want to be comfortable! Comfort first, people.
Now for some Elsie Lou at 19 months talk! No need for a smooth transition between topics because uh she is just so stinking amazing. I have mentioned we are all convinced she is the best/most beautiful/smartest little cookie. And the new little antics need to be recorded before they slip my mom brain, like the pitcher of lemonade I found in the pantry, and how I just could not remember how to spell pitcher. There are just so many things! Including her extensive food vocabulary. I am sure every first time parent feels this way, but when she uses a new word in the correct context and says it right, my mind is always blown. Last night I woke up to a tiny voice at 4 am saying "poop! poop!" I walked to her crib in the dark and patted her bum to see if there was indeed a poop- there was not- but her jammies and crib were soaked in pee. Thank you, parents choice diapers. I got her new clothes and a new dipe- left the pee crib for morning ( it's not gross at 4 am) and tucked her into bed with me. She settles down and then puts her face close to mine and says, "toes!" Her toes weren't covered by the blanket. She is just a communicator and works really hard to put her thoughts and feelings into words. Like today she came into the kitchen and said "Help you." I nearly died. It was the cutest thing ever ever, even if it meant dinner took twice as long to make. She says new words everyday. She loves nursery rhymes, her new favorite is "mo mo" which in Elsie means once there was a snow man. She likes ring around the rosey, and she spins around and falls down and demands more and more. She is a girly girl, and often asks for a bow in her hair. She loves to be outside, loves to have stories read to her, loves fruits and veggies, and is currently obsessed with the toilet. I was in the kitchen and she comes in a dumps a cup of water on the floor, I go through my whole "Oh no, lets's clean it up!" mommy business when it hits me that I did not give her the cup of water. I walk to the bathroom- it's soaked. It's toilet water. She was having a ball dumping it all around!! Insert exasperated emoji face. She is doing really well with her glasses, and likes to lift them up, look at you and say "peek a boo!" She is just my sunshine. With the exception of teething days, which are very hard and sad!! She used to be really good at only having a binky for sleep, and I am not sure when it happened but it was a slippery slope to binky addiction and we had a serious binkaholic on our hands. I was truly afraid to dial it back and take it from her! It took a few days to gather the courage, but she is doing so well and only asks for it when she is tired. I think she is much happier not having the silly thing to worry about during the day. This stage is SO MUCH FUN. She is seriously just my tiny pal. She is very affectionate and is so sweet with her baby dolls! I hope it extends to a baby sister. She keeps us laughing, our Elsie Lou. I am so very very grateful I get to be her momma.
Friday, June 12, 2015
little miss 15 months
There is never a dull moment with Elsie Lou! She is full of spunk and such a smart and tender hearted girl. I don't have the energy to be super wordy at this point ( bed time please!!) but here are some things I will be happy I recorded down the road.
- Whenever she wants me to come sit with her, she pats the floor next to her as if to say "sit here momma!!" And she wants me to sit with her all. the.time.
- She is learning animal noises, bears say "roooarr", birds say "tweet tweet", bunnies go " hop hop hop" and dogs, "woof woof."
- She is a serial bathtub pooper. She knows she isn't supposed to now, and says " uh oh! uh oh!" as a warning, but if I don't get to her in time... well. Get some water boiling, because those bath toys need sanitized.
- On the topic of uh oh's, it's probably her favorite phrase. Secondly to "mo!!!", which is more, usually about food. Sometimes she says "mo momma" and it is the cutest thing ever ever.
- She is still a very good eater, but she HATES eggs. I was subbing in nursery for a few weeks and she discovered fruit snacks at snack time. She is crazy about fruit snacks. I had a packet in my pocket at the dr. for after her shots. I opened them up immediately after and the tears stopped right away.
- Els loves music. We have music on a lot during the day while we get things done, and she likes to snap her fingers and wave her arms. She LOVES the song "do as I am doing" and so we have to sing it and do the hand motions several times a day.
- She's charming. She loves to smile and make faces at people at the grocery store and at church. She LOVES to share her snacks with her baby friends, and loves it even more if she can stuff food directly in their mouths.
- She has laid off on kissing everyone all the time, but randomly during the day she will toddle up to me and kiss me wherever she can reach. Sometimes when I am kneeling giving her a bath she will kiss me on the nose, and it makes every bad nap and hard day worth it.
- I always turn on her sleep sheep and rock her for a few songs before I lay her down in her crib. She likes her cheek to be right up against mine. She is such a lovey.
- She loves to sit in a chair like a big girl.
- She might be really far sighted and need some cutesy poo glasses. We have a specialist appointment at the end of the month.
- If we could spend every second of the day outside, she would be ecstatic. She loves to pick flowers, raspberries, and peas fresh from the field.
picking grandma's flowers 
sleepy lovey naps best with momma
striking a pose
- loving her birdies
- thinking her whole shirt is a snack pocket
- straight lounging
Friday, April 17, 2015
a happy month
I am not going to continue with regular monthly updates for Lou, but there have been so many great things happening as of late! One, she weaned herself. I never intentionally weaned her, she just dropped feedings gradually until at her year birthday we were down to one, and then only some days, and then none at all. I didn't realize how inconvenient it was to plan what to wear around easy access to the boobs, but now I am free to wear whatever back zip peplum number I please. No more dragging pumped bottles along on road trips and nursing in dressing room stalls while shopping. I am ok with this! Also isn't the word weaned just the worst? If she is happy to be done, I am happy she is done. Two, we got her acid reflux under control. She is on a new med that is helping so much! She eats better and is a much happier girl- no more waking up EVERY HOUR all sad and mommy needing. Both of these factors, and along with Elsie's pediatrician assuring me that it's ok to let the little bug cry, we sleep trained. I wrote up a plan of the nighttime routine and what we would do each night. We do the routine, and lay her down, and leave to let her sooth herself. The first night she cried for 30 agonizing minutes. I cried. It was horrible. She, however, adjusted very quickly, and here we are night 4 only, and I lay her down and there are no tears whatsoever, and she sleeps in far greater chunks than she ever has before. I some thought with my whole heart that I would never ever let her cry to sleep, but at it was actually doing her a disservice. Self soothing is invaluable, as is both her sleep and my own!!! I think she was really ready for it, too.
Elsie walks all over the last few days! I honestly think it has to do with her better sleep and having more energy. It never gets old to see those little feet toddling over to me!! She is just the sweetest girl- very affectionate. At her last play date she wasn't as interested in the play ground as she was feeding her little friend and trying to give her kisses. She gives me lots of hugs, complete with back pats! We are teaching her to blow kisses and she does many darling variations- none of them spot on but all super cute. Sometimes I blow her kisses and she pretends to eat them.
Little girl loves to be outside, so we try to go play everyday. She likes to pick and sniff flowers and watch our new dog max play fetch.
She is obsessed with the little easy peel oranges and blueberries. She can eat three oranges in a sitting and wants more!! I am astounded at how much she can eat. Her love for books and story time is still full force, we read before sleep, when she wakes up, and when she brings books over to me and I can't resist. She loves her stuffed animal panda and sleeps with it every night. She has three sleep musts- her blankey, her bink and her bear. She only gets them at sleep time so it makes them extra soothing : )
Speaking of sleep... when she is napping and after she goes down I have found a new little hobby! I have always had an interest in sewing but haven't had the patience to really sit down and make something worth while until now. I knew I wanted to make her a dress, and it has just snowballed into pouring over fabric and looking at how different pieces are made while I fold the laundry. I have made Lou three dresses, and I have no interest in slowing down. Although we might have to cool it with the dresses- their aren't enough Sundays for this girl to wear all of them.
I used my best momtography skills to get a 13 month shot of her in two of them. She is so fun to take pictures of at this age because she is so smiley and lovey.
Elsie walks all over the last few days! I honestly think it has to do with her better sleep and having more energy. It never gets old to see those little feet toddling over to me!! She is just the sweetest girl- very affectionate. At her last play date she wasn't as interested in the play ground as she was feeding her little friend and trying to give her kisses. She gives me lots of hugs, complete with back pats! We are teaching her to blow kisses and she does many darling variations- none of them spot on but all super cute. Sometimes I blow her kisses and she pretends to eat them.
Little girl loves to be outside, so we try to go play everyday. She likes to pick and sniff flowers and watch our new dog max play fetch.
She is obsessed with the little easy peel oranges and blueberries. She can eat three oranges in a sitting and wants more!! I am astounded at how much she can eat. Her love for books and story time is still full force, we read before sleep, when she wakes up, and when she brings books over to me and I can't resist. She loves her stuffed animal panda and sleeps with it every night. She has three sleep musts- her blankey, her bink and her bear. She only gets them at sleep time so it makes them extra soothing : )
Speaking of sleep... when she is napping and after she goes down I have found a new little hobby! I have always had an interest in sewing but haven't had the patience to really sit down and make something worth while until now. I knew I wanted to make her a dress, and it has just snowballed into pouring over fabric and looking at how different pieces are made while I fold the laundry. I have made Lou three dresses, and I have no interest in slowing down. Although we might have to cool it with the dresses- their aren't enough Sundays for this girl to wear all of them.
I used my best momtography skills to get a 13 month shot of her in two of them. She is so fun to take pictures of at this age because she is so smiley and lovey.
Friday, March 27, 2015
"mom shower" defined
You took morning nap with your little because they were up so much in the night. Now it's time to run errands and you look
They take on many forms, my most frequented is called " the 5 minutes to fab from far away". Because up close it's clear that your dry shampoo is still all clotted at the crown of your head. Ideal for grocery shopping, and play dates with friends who love you regardless of how many days you have worn your same momiform.
here's how: load your hair up with dry shampoo. that's why you buy suave, because you literally dump in on your head by the bottle and you spend so much on diapers you can't afford the good stuff. while it soaks up the oil from your day four hair ( aint nobody got time for a wash and blow dry) put on clean underwear. Toss on your go to choice of boyfriend jeans, brush your teethers, and form your hair into a disheveled pony. Not caring is so hot right now.
Then there is the "date night dropout" because it is Friday night. and you want to get that knee down leg shave for your man. It's called dropout because if you weren't lucky enough to get it done during nap, then it's for your little one dropping all their toys out of their high chair that you pulled into the bathroom and strapped them in with a snack so you could scrub the important parts and get almost all of the conditioner rinsed out of their hair before they attempt a high chair jail break.
here's how: bring your sweet babe and their favorite snack, and put them in the high chair in the bathroom- within sight and leap out of shower naked to pick up dropped toy distance of course. NOW RUN. Go fast. because you have three minutes to get yourself scrubba dubbed.
Lastly, their is the "sunday spa" where your husband is home to watch your littles and you are free to sit down in there on the bench like an old lady might and relish in the hot water rinsing the baby oatmeal out of your hair. The holy grail of mom showers.
Note: I never promised anything about run on sentences here, people.
What is your go to mom shower? Also where is my laugh/sob emoji when I need it!!
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I like this picture of my lovey using my face as a warm pillow. And since this post is tragically real, you can notice my fantastic post partum hair regrowth. They are the sidebangs I never wanted, ha ha!!
Monday, March 23, 2015
one year!!
Elsie is a year old and I just have so much to say about my girl I don't even know where to start.
One of her favorite books right now is I Love You Through and Through, and there is a page that goes, " I love you silent, and talking". One the silent page I always purse my lips and stay quiet for a few seconds and I go blah blah blah on the next page and she laughs and laughs. Today she brought the book over to me when I was folding laundry and mimicked what I do exactly!! I am amazed with how quickly she picks things up. In her Wee Little Chick book, the mom hen says, "Tut, tut, tut, she's my wee little chick, and she's just big enough!" Elsie likes to say "tut tut!!" I die. I also tell Elsie that she is my wee little chick and she's just big enough, it's kind of our special book.
She has been initiating walking all by herself and can walk a few feet before she is done! She smiles so big and is so proud of herself. When she took her first steps I cried. I am just so very pleased with her and blown away by how quickly she is growing up. She talks a lot, she has so much to say. Words we can make out for sure are momma, dada, kitty, dog, and grandpa. She will copy something you say right away, but then forget about it and not say it anymore, like animal noises and things. She has a fisher price noah's ark toy and she knows lion, elephant, and zebra if I ask her for them.
The cutest thing she does right now is shrug her arms when we ask her where something went. She will hide a toy in a drawer and raise her arms up like " Where did it go!?" She will knock food off her tray and shrug, too, like she has no idea what happened to it. It's hilarious. And messy.
She is so kind! She has so many hugs and snuggles for her stuffed animals and likes to pretend feed them and make little munching noises. She loves kissing, and when I am putting her to bed she sometimes puts her forehead on my lips repeatedly because she wants a little kissy. Elliott will kiss me and then she will kiss us both. He says she has my French genes hahhah as she likes to just stick her tongue in your mouth!!
She is getting so brave. She thinks everyone is her friend and at church she wants my friends to hold her and goes around taking toys and generally owning the place and demanding people's smart phones. She loves the slide at the park and play dates with her little friend who is close to her age.
She loves to go for wagon rides around the farm and visit her grandpa's black lab and the chickens. She loves to ride in the main compartment of the grocery cart and munch a cheese stick. She loves reading books and "helping" me with my household duties throughout the day. She likes to take a wipey and wipe the floor and walls. She always tries to hug my Swiffer duster. It's so fluffy, like an animal.
My fantastic eater is going through a picky phase, and I joke you not would not touch her birthday cake!! That is when it started. I think it has to do with teething and life being too interesting at this point for her to settle down and eat, so I spoon feed her a lot to make sure she gets enough these days.
Ever since our swaddle days ended ( around 8 months) full nights sleep are few and far between. I will NOT have future babies be swaddle dependent for sleep!!!! It's actually a point of struggle for us and any stretch over three hours I am really happy with. My under eye circles are pretty impressive at this point! She wakes up and wants to nurse, which I think is primarily a comfort thing, and I am so tired I just do because it puts her right back to sleep. She has always struggled with reflux and it still bothers her. Most babies her age are sleeping through the night at this point and I do feel envious, but every baby is different and I figure she will sleep through the night someday! I am trying to push whole milk during the day so she gets her fill, she only nurses at night and sometimes when she wakes up in the morning lately. Post nursing boobs get two thumbs down, oh my goodness.
I feel like a lot of people announce their second pregnancy around babies first birthday, and I started to feel all this pressure as though I am not fulfilling my measure as a woman if I am not knee deep in dirty diapers and spit up or something. I don't want a huge gap, but I am not quite ready yet. I vacillate between wanting no more ever on really hard days and like 100 babies all over me. So we will prob settle in the 3-4-5 range. On the really hard days note- Elsie has discovered how to flush the toilet. And the bathroom is her favorite ( insert sobbing emoji). Two toilet binks today. Two.
You are probably wondering how long I am going to ramble but I hate to end talking about sleep deprivation and binks lost to the questionable waters of the toilet because that is such a small part of it to me!! It is such a joy to be a momma. Husband said to her the other day, "kid you make life hard but you make it better." Amen. But really, doesn't that sum it up perfectly?
One of her favorite books right now is I Love You Through and Through, and there is a page that goes, " I love you silent, and talking". One the silent page I always purse my lips and stay quiet for a few seconds and I go blah blah blah on the next page and she laughs and laughs. Today she brought the book over to me when I was folding laundry and mimicked what I do exactly!! I am amazed with how quickly she picks things up. In her Wee Little Chick book, the mom hen says, "Tut, tut, tut, she's my wee little chick, and she's just big enough!" Elsie likes to say "tut tut!!" I die. I also tell Elsie that she is my wee little chick and she's just big enough, it's kind of our special book.
She has been initiating walking all by herself and can walk a few feet before she is done! She smiles so big and is so proud of herself. When she took her first steps I cried. I am just so very pleased with her and blown away by how quickly she is growing up. She talks a lot, she has so much to say. Words we can make out for sure are momma, dada, kitty, dog, and grandpa. She will copy something you say right away, but then forget about it and not say it anymore, like animal noises and things. She has a fisher price noah's ark toy and she knows lion, elephant, and zebra if I ask her for them.
The cutest thing she does right now is shrug her arms when we ask her where something went. She will hide a toy in a drawer and raise her arms up like " Where did it go!?" She will knock food off her tray and shrug, too, like she has no idea what happened to it. It's hilarious. And messy.
She is so kind! She has so many hugs and snuggles for her stuffed animals and likes to pretend feed them and make little munching noises. She loves kissing, and when I am putting her to bed she sometimes puts her forehead on my lips repeatedly because she wants a little kissy. Elliott will kiss me and then she will kiss us both. He says she has my French genes hahhah as she likes to just stick her tongue in your mouth!!
She is getting so brave. She thinks everyone is her friend and at church she wants my friends to hold her and goes around taking toys and generally owning the place and demanding people's smart phones. She loves the slide at the park and play dates with her little friend who is close to her age.
She loves to go for wagon rides around the farm and visit her grandpa's black lab and the chickens. She loves to ride in the main compartment of the grocery cart and munch a cheese stick. She loves reading books and "helping" me with my household duties throughout the day. She likes to take a wipey and wipe the floor and walls. She always tries to hug my Swiffer duster. It's so fluffy, like an animal.
My fantastic eater is going through a picky phase, and I joke you not would not touch her birthday cake!! That is when it started. I think it has to do with teething and life being too interesting at this point for her to settle down and eat, so I spoon feed her a lot to make sure she gets enough these days.
Ever since our swaddle days ended ( around 8 months) full nights sleep are few and far between. I will NOT have future babies be swaddle dependent for sleep!!!! It's actually a point of struggle for us and any stretch over three hours I am really happy with. My under eye circles are pretty impressive at this point! She wakes up and wants to nurse, which I think is primarily a comfort thing, and I am so tired I just do because it puts her right back to sleep. She has always struggled with reflux and it still bothers her. Most babies her age are sleeping through the night at this point and I do feel envious, but every baby is different and I figure she will sleep through the night someday! I am trying to push whole milk during the day so she gets her fill, she only nurses at night and sometimes when she wakes up in the morning lately. Post nursing boobs get two thumbs down, oh my goodness.
I feel like a lot of people announce their second pregnancy around babies first birthday, and I started to feel all this pressure as though I am not fulfilling my measure as a woman if I am not knee deep in dirty diapers and spit up or something. I don't want a huge gap, but I am not quite ready yet. I vacillate between wanting no more ever on really hard days and like 100 babies all over me. So we will prob settle in the 3-4-5 range. On the really hard days note- Elsie has discovered how to flush the toilet. And the bathroom is her favorite ( insert sobbing emoji). Two toilet binks today. Two.
You are probably wondering how long I am going to ramble but I hate to end talking about sleep deprivation and binks lost to the questionable waters of the toilet because that is such a small part of it to me!! It is such a joy to be a momma. Husband said to her the other day, "kid you make life hard but you make it better." Amen. But really, doesn't that sum it up perfectly?
I would be lying if I told you I wasn't crazy in love with the cake I made her.
We couldn't get her dress off fast enough for cake!!
On clingy days I just pack her around and I get a lot done. Plus cuddles. Everyone wins!
Where did it go?!
loving her kitty
I couldn't pry this bunny out of her hands at joanne fabrics. even to scan it when I gave in and bought it for her!
"No pictures, Mom!! Let's slide!"
Play date
Saturday, February 21, 2015
11 months!
I think I put off these posts because I am fundamentally in denial of Elsie getting older. However, I am IN LOVE with this stage of babyhood, and things need to be recorded!!!
Els is a happy girl and a big lovey. She gives the biggest sloppiest kisses which consist primarily of her licking your face. You couldn't resist. She loves to love stuffed animals and baby dolls. She is very nurturing. She hugs them and pats them and gives them kisses, too. At night she falls asleep with a lovey stuffed animal in her arms, sometimes two, because she can't decide.
She is an enthusiastic eater and is ALWAYS hungry. The girl loves her solids and all food, except for two things- mommy's canned peaches and squash. Those she vehemently refuses!! There is all sorts of dramatic sputtering and gagging when either is involved. She isn't appeased unless she is having what you are having, and if you have something yummy you will be instant friends. She routinely finds her daddy at lunchtime and tries to munch all his food. She only has two teeth at this point but trust me when I tell you it does not inhibit her whatsoever, she is an expert gummer.
Elsie Lou still adores her books. Once we finish reading one, she will climb down and hand me another to read. She likes to sit on the floor and look through her books, her favorites are the Karen Katz lift the flap books, and the Wee Little Chick series. She loves the giant illustrations and always giggles at the cow page. She looks at the Wee Little Chick several times a day.
She is always babbling and happy yelling, and says momma, dada & kitty. Every time Elliott comes through the door she says "DADA!" and she will yell for him from the bottom of the stairs. She understands simple commands like stand up, sit down, come here, and no. I always tell her to leave her binky after nap and when she wakes up and she takes it out and drops it in her crib. The other day someone in a movie said something to the effect of "put your hands up!" and she did!
Everything is a phone. She will hold remotes up to her hear and talk, talk, talk. She is supremely interested in lids and screw on caps. She can twist lids off so we have to be careful!! She gets really focused into her little projects and can spend 20 minutes focused on one thing. She loves the bath and "helping" me put laundry in and loading the dishwasher. She likes to go on walks to look at the farm and go on outings with momma. She likes to sit in the main compartment of the shopping cart and munch on a cheese stick. She likes the vacuum and makes a "mmmmmmmm" noise when I have it on like she is mimicking it!!
She isn't walking yet but there are some attempted steps being taken. She won't nurse more than 3 or 4 times a day at this point and LOVES to drink water.
Sometimes I say that she is 11 months going on 11 years because she thinks she is a little adult. I love her big smile and her laugh!! We love to tickle and wrestle before bed. She is so so fun and I am really enjoying this stage of my Elsie Lou!!
Els is a happy girl and a big lovey. She gives the biggest sloppiest kisses which consist primarily of her licking your face. You couldn't resist. She loves to love stuffed animals and baby dolls. She is very nurturing. She hugs them and pats them and gives them kisses, too. At night she falls asleep with a lovey stuffed animal in her arms, sometimes two, because she can't decide.
She is an enthusiastic eater and is ALWAYS hungry. The girl loves her solids and all food, except for two things- mommy's canned peaches and squash. Those she vehemently refuses!! There is all sorts of dramatic sputtering and gagging when either is involved. She isn't appeased unless she is having what you are having, and if you have something yummy you will be instant friends. She routinely finds her daddy at lunchtime and tries to munch all his food. She only has two teeth at this point but trust me when I tell you it does not inhibit her whatsoever, she is an expert gummer.
Elsie Lou still adores her books. Once we finish reading one, she will climb down and hand me another to read. She likes to sit on the floor and look through her books, her favorites are the Karen Katz lift the flap books, and the Wee Little Chick series. She loves the giant illustrations and always giggles at the cow page. She looks at the Wee Little Chick several times a day.
She is always babbling and happy yelling, and says momma, dada & kitty. Every time Elliott comes through the door she says "DADA!" and she will yell for him from the bottom of the stairs. She understands simple commands like stand up, sit down, come here, and no. I always tell her to leave her binky after nap and when she wakes up and she takes it out and drops it in her crib. The other day someone in a movie said something to the effect of "put your hands up!" and she did!
Everything is a phone. She will hold remotes up to her hear and talk, talk, talk. She is supremely interested in lids and screw on caps. She can twist lids off so we have to be careful!! She gets really focused into her little projects and can spend 20 minutes focused on one thing. She loves the bath and "helping" me put laundry in and loading the dishwasher. She likes to go on walks to look at the farm and go on outings with momma. She likes to sit in the main compartment of the shopping cart and munch on a cheese stick. She likes the vacuum and makes a "mmmmmmmm" noise when I have it on like she is mimicking it!!
She isn't walking yet but there are some attempted steps being taken. She won't nurse more than 3 or 4 times a day at this point and LOVES to drink water.
Sometimes I say that she is 11 months going on 11 years because she thinks she is a little adult. I love her big smile and her laugh!! We love to tickle and wrestle before bed. She is so so fun and I am really enjoying this stage of my Elsie Lou!!
trying to put on mommy's slipper
this lovey. she fell asleep in the car and I had to snap a pic of her looking all sweet like a tiny baby!!
my little valentine!
petting a kitty with dad.
she always has a foot up when she eats.
she loves to play with magnets!
eating her broccoli
hanging with grandpa on the farm
trying on the dress I made her
Saturday, January 3, 2015
9 Months and then 10 months
9 months-
My little Elsie Lou is pulling herself up on everything!! During thanksgiving break she was trying it out and now she is a full on pro- couches, chairs, people... you are a mountain to be climbed. The Christmas tree is her Everest, but we are doing our best to keep her at base camp with some baby friendly & low hanging ornaments that she can stay occupied with. It cracks me up to see such a little person standing with those little pudgy legs. It's all she wants to do. When she first was trying to pull herself up she would try to use her mouth and bite and it was so funny. She is still a scooter. She gets into crawling position a lot and can take steps but she must think it's unnecessary at this point since she is getting everywhere she wants to go.
She still has her one little tooth, but it doesn't stop her from going full piranha. When she is nursing. She knows she isn't supposed to, but she does it and then looks up at me with this mischievous smile. Pushing boundaries that one.
She loves to feed herself, and I let her quite a bit since it's less messy than her intercepting her spoon and rubbing it all over her hair and face.
And then Els woke up from a nap early - the holidays happened, and I never got back to finishing the 9 month post. Onward to ten months, friends!
Within the last few days she has started to stand on her own, proud and tall. She can stand without holding anything for a few seconds, with the cutest "MOM LOOK!" smile on her face.
She can crawl- although she still doesn't prefer it. She is going to do things her own way and in her own time, my little miss.
She is still my little foodie. Her favorite snacks are banana slices and avocado. She is really over purees and wants the chunky stuff. I try to just give her a mashed version of whatever I am eating, or components of it.
She loves to share her binky with you, and give big sloppy kisses. She loves to wave. She says "dada" and "ba" for ball. You know, because the word ball is so much more important than say, "momma". She loves music, and likes to bounce and wave her arms when it comes on. She has a few toys that have songs, and she likes to lay her head right against them so she can get a really good listen. She likes to pretend different things are a phone and she holds them up to her ear and chats away.
She is in love with the white supersoft Jellycat that I got her for Christmas. She snuggles it at night and likes to have it along as a car buddy. Els likes to hand you her toys and she is grasping little concepts like stacking blocks, and putting toys away in her basket. She can push a ball back and forth with me. I watched a very concentrated little Els try to put her sock back on a few days ago. For some reason it was the cutest thing.
She is over hating everyone!! Hallelujah!! She tolerates many people and even likes some. I am sooo very glad. The only mommy will do days could be tough. She is getting brave and likes to venture out in church and rob the binks of unsuspecting other babes, and to bang on different surfaces until she finds one loud enough to turn everyone's head in sacrament meeting.
She is a petite little girl, at her 9 month visit she weighed 19 pounds and was 28 inches long. She has always always been a picky nurser, and has been getting up once or twice to nurse at night. I figure growing as fast as babies do she needs it. We have had some rough nights with teething ( two little teeth now !), but I am not the cry it out type. It's a little late in the game but I am slowly working on getting her to sleep in her own bed.
She doesn't like to be restrained. I blame the swaddle. PTSD. ( Post Tight Swaddle Disorder). Sometimes it takes two people to wrestle her into her carseat (after she is in, she is fine) She doesn't have much tolerance for the stroller, and she tries to climb out of her high chair.
It is literally something new everyday at this point. I am so enjoying watching her learn how to be her own little person, she is just brimming with personality and such a spunky girl. She has my whole heart a million times over, that Elsie Lou.
Friday, November 14, 2014
Elsie Lou at 8 months
Elsie Lou is 8 months!!! I cannot believe it, and the last two have flown by so quickly there wasn't even time for a 7 month post. I was reading an article the other day about babies who are "more intense, more sensitive, and more persistent. Welcome to the world of babies who are more." Little E is more. More fun, more hilarious, and more wiggly than any baby that I know of. Most likely because she came from two parents who fit that exact description.
The most apparent trait of Elsie at this point to anyone who meets her is that she only wants her momma. At best she will let another person hold her for a few seconds before she lets out a wail, at worst, she starts screaming when she SEES a stranger. Like that time I tried to get a gym membership. She wasn't going to let that happen for a second. I am used to it by now, but there were times in the early days of her attachment that I would be heartbroken because she hates everyone, and this momma's arms need a break once and a while.
This stage has been the most work by far, but the most fun. She has so much personality and a definite sense of humor. She likes to play peek-a-boo with me, and she thinks it's hilarious to put her binky in my mouth, and laughs like crazy when I sniff her bottom to see if she's stinky. I love her laugh!! When she gets excited she scrunches up her nose and does this darling little snort on repeat.
She is supremely interested in food. She loves it all! She loves the standard baby food, but I try to give her a mooshed version of whatever I am eating- avocado, soggy bread, mashed rice, just anything. I think her favorite at this point is mangos. She adores mangos! If it weren't for her toothlessness I am pretty positive that she would like nothing more than to devour a burger or a good steak. I keep thinking her teeth are going to pop through any day. I have been thinking that for 3 months now. She likes to gum thick apple slices as a teether. I tell her she can take her time with the teeth- as long as I am nursing and she is a biter I am completely ok with it.
She has a hybrid scoot crawl, which I have named "The Scrawl". It is so hilarious to watch her really get going and to see where she wants to go and what she wants to do. I love to watch her venture out and look back for reassurance that I am still there before she scoots out again. She likes to be on the go, no time for even a diaper change for that girl. I most times have to give her an amazingly interesting toy, diaper her standing up, or for the stinks put my leg over her gently so she can't escape mid bum cleaning.
It is just something new everyday! I love how interactive she is and am amazed by how quickly she picks things up. I only had to show her how to wave hello a few times before she was waving to everyone in costco.
I wish time would slow down a little bit. I try to close my eyes often and try to make a permanent memory of rocking that sweet girl to sleep and her sweet baby smell and the weight of her in my arms. It's amazing how such a tiny person can make your heart so big, even after she has pulled half of your hair out.
I don't know why I can't rotate this picture.
The most apparent trait of Elsie at this point to anyone who meets her is that she only wants her momma. At best she will let another person hold her for a few seconds before she lets out a wail, at worst, she starts screaming when she SEES a stranger. Like that time I tried to get a gym membership. She wasn't going to let that happen for a second. I am used to it by now, but there were times in the early days of her attachment that I would be heartbroken because she hates everyone, and this momma's arms need a break once and a while.
This stage has been the most work by far, but the most fun. She has so much personality and a definite sense of humor. She likes to play peek-a-boo with me, and she thinks it's hilarious to put her binky in my mouth, and laughs like crazy when I sniff her bottom to see if she's stinky. I love her laugh!! When she gets excited she scrunches up her nose and does this darling little snort on repeat.
She is supremely interested in food. She loves it all! She loves the standard baby food, but I try to give her a mooshed version of whatever I am eating- avocado, soggy bread, mashed rice, just anything. I think her favorite at this point is mangos. She adores mangos! If it weren't for her toothlessness I am pretty positive that she would like nothing more than to devour a burger or a good steak. I keep thinking her teeth are going to pop through any day. I have been thinking that for 3 months now. She likes to gum thick apple slices as a teether. I tell her she can take her time with the teeth- as long as I am nursing and she is a biter I am completely ok with it.
She has a hybrid scoot crawl, which I have named "The Scrawl". It is so hilarious to watch her really get going and to see where she wants to go and what she wants to do. I love to watch her venture out and look back for reassurance that I am still there before she scoots out again. She likes to be on the go, no time for even a diaper change for that girl. I most times have to give her an amazingly interesting toy, diaper her standing up, or for the stinks put my leg over her gently so she can't escape mid bum cleaning.
It is just something new everyday! I love how interactive she is and am amazed by how quickly she picks things up. I only had to show her how to wave hello a few times before she was waving to everyone in costco.
I wish time would slow down a little bit. I try to close my eyes often and try to make a permanent memory of rocking that sweet girl to sleep and her sweet baby smell and the weight of her in my arms. It's amazing how such a tiny person can make your heart so big, even after she has pulled half of your hair out.
Thursday, September 11, 2014
Elsie Lou at 6 months.
Something about 6 months feels like such a milestone! I have survived half a year of motherhood. Elsie has survived half a year of me mothering her. And frankly I adore her to pieces.
Elsie Lou is a going machine, which was perfectly illustrated at her 6 month visit today. I stood her on the table and she instantly discovers the crinkly paper under her little feet and starts stomp dancing it to pieces! She proceeded to yank and try to eat the stethoscope and grab everything she possibly could! "She's a goer!" Her Dr. Says. She screamed during her shots, but I picked her up and gave her a bink and she was comforted. Until I tried to put her in her car seat of course. It's a bit of a wrestling match these days. That is what people notice. One, her giant blue eyes, and two- this girl is on the go!! In the words of my mother in law , Els is "kind of a full time job." So excuse my perpetual laundry pile. Her main goal in life is to take off walking with no prior training. She wants to be upright like a big girl. She has about mastered sitting up! It felt like an all of the sudden kind of thing. Like one day she was wobbley and the next day, she didn't need any help at all! I love to watch her sit and pull her toys out of her basket. It is so cute how concentrated she gets playing with her little duck taggy and trying to get her little chubby fingers to pinch one little tag. She is a determined little thing.
She is observant. She likes to watch people and cars and animals. Elsie LOVES animals. Especially when she can grab big handfuls of fur before I can stop her. I have had to pry my mother in law's cat's tail out of her clenched fists a time or two.
She is very social! She smiles at everyone at church, and when they come to chat with her she sometimes hides her face in my chest all bashful. It's pretty adorable. She has got some spunk and she has got some silliness like her momma. She is getting more and more talkative! Especially to other littles.
On a smellier note- For the love of stinky diapers can we please go back to breast milk only!? But seriously. You momma's know what I am talking about. But Elsie Lou loves her little pureed meals, and I love watching her face as she tries new things and chomps down on her little spoon. Her favorite so far- pears. A perfectly ripe pear blends up to perfection for baby food! I have had a few people ask when I am planning on weaning her off breastfeeding,. I don't know why people ask me this. But I tell them I will quit breastfeeding when she is embarrassed by it. Ha! Breastfeeding has gone well for us and as long as it is working out then we will keep that stuff up. I have had two instances where my supply dipped scary low- once when I got sick and one weekend where my grandmother had passed away and I had to speak at her funeral and got super stressed. But it snapped back. It's just easy. No bottles. No fuss. Got that baby food? Oh yeah, it's in my shirt. Obvs now we have to drag along some solid goodness, but I like to keep things simple around here. Best place to breastfeed on the go? Nordstrom's ladies lounge. Hands down.
The girl just loves food. Just tonight, she was sitting on my lap at dinner and swiped a handful of green beans off my plate and stuffed them in her mouth pretty successfully. It was so sneaky! So I started to laugh and then instant panic mode set in as I fished those green beans out of her chomper. She knows what to do with a plate of food, people.
I always wonder what effect different things will have on her. In a way your first kiddo is a great experiment- there are so many choices to make. I worry about little things. And then I tell myself not to. There are so many different kinds of mommas and we all have different strengths. While we may not be perfect mommas, we are the perfect mom for OUR littles.
She had a really rough week teething and love felt heavy. So very heavy. I would pray for patience for my sad babe, and to have patience for my husband. I felt so by myself with Elliott working from before we get up to after Els would go to sleep. I have my happy girl back and I know that I will have lots of ups and downs through motherhood and I just feel so grateful to my family and friends for helping me and keeping me sane ( mainly ; ) )
Elsie Lou is a going machine, which was perfectly illustrated at her 6 month visit today. I stood her on the table and she instantly discovers the crinkly paper under her little feet and starts stomp dancing it to pieces! She proceeded to yank and try to eat the stethoscope and grab everything she possibly could! "She's a goer!" Her Dr. Says. She screamed during her shots, but I picked her up and gave her a bink and she was comforted. Until I tried to put her in her car seat of course. It's a bit of a wrestling match these days. That is what people notice. One, her giant blue eyes, and two- this girl is on the go!! In the words of my mother in law , Els is "kind of a full time job." So excuse my perpetual laundry pile. Her main goal in life is to take off walking with no prior training. She wants to be upright like a big girl. She has about mastered sitting up! It felt like an all of the sudden kind of thing. Like one day she was wobbley and the next day, she didn't need any help at all! I love to watch her sit and pull her toys out of her basket. It is so cute how concentrated she gets playing with her little duck taggy and trying to get her little chubby fingers to pinch one little tag. She is a determined little thing.
She is observant. She likes to watch people and cars and animals. Elsie LOVES animals. Especially when she can grab big handfuls of fur before I can stop her. I have had to pry my mother in law's cat's tail out of her clenched fists a time or two.
She is very social! She smiles at everyone at church, and when they come to chat with her she sometimes hides her face in my chest all bashful. It's pretty adorable. She has got some spunk and she has got some silliness like her momma. She is getting more and more talkative! Especially to other littles.
On a smellier note- For the love of stinky diapers can we please go back to breast milk only!? But seriously. You momma's know what I am talking about. But Elsie Lou loves her little pureed meals, and I love watching her face as she tries new things and chomps down on her little spoon. Her favorite so far- pears. A perfectly ripe pear blends up to perfection for baby food! I have had a few people ask when I am planning on weaning her off breastfeeding,. I don't know why people ask me this. But I tell them I will quit breastfeeding when she is embarrassed by it. Ha! Breastfeeding has gone well for us and as long as it is working out then we will keep that stuff up. I have had two instances where my supply dipped scary low- once when I got sick and one weekend where my grandmother had passed away and I had to speak at her funeral and got super stressed. But it snapped back. It's just easy. No bottles. No fuss. Got that baby food? Oh yeah, it's in my shirt. Obvs now we have to drag along some solid goodness, but I like to keep things simple around here. Best place to breastfeed on the go? Nordstrom's ladies lounge. Hands down.
The girl just loves food. Just tonight, she was sitting on my lap at dinner and swiped a handful of green beans off my plate and stuffed them in her mouth pretty successfully. It was so sneaky! So I started to laugh and then instant panic mode set in as I fished those green beans out of her chomper. She knows what to do with a plate of food, people.
I always wonder what effect different things will have on her. In a way your first kiddo is a great experiment- there are so many choices to make. I worry about little things. And then I tell myself not to. There are so many different kinds of mommas and we all have different strengths. While we may not be perfect mommas, we are the perfect mom for OUR littles.
She had a really rough week teething and love felt heavy. So very heavy. I would pray for patience for my sad babe, and to have patience for my husband. I felt so by myself with Elliott working from before we get up to after Els would go to sleep. I have my happy girl back and I know that I will have lots of ups and downs through motherhood and I just feel so grateful to my family and friends for helping me and keeping me sane ( mainly ; ) )
yep she owns a controversial baby mobile.
Tuesday, September 2, 2014
love/hate swaddling
Swaddling. I am unsure if it's the only way we would have ever got any sleep, or if it has ruined her for sleep. Every time I think to myself, "I should try weaning Elsie off swaddling again", I then ask, " do I hate myself?". Unswaddled in her crib, Elsie rolls from side to side, crashing into the bars in her sleep. When it finally wakes her up, she is either super enthralled that she is free to scoot around and scream like a pterodactyl in the dark, or their is instant crying. Neither of which are very conducive to MY sleeping. Ideally you would wean them off by swaddling with one arm out, until they master that without bashing themselves in the face too many times, and then you let the other one free, until you have a baby who doesn't flop around like a fish out of water in the night. Or, you can gradually loosen it, but then you have the issue of this loose blanket in the crib. Swaddled, Elsie sleeps from 8 pm to 8am, and only starts grunting when she gets hungry. I then can feed her, change her ( I won't let her sleep in some 3 pound soaking diaper) and wrap her back up and we both sleep like rocks. So you can see why I have stuck with it for so long- Generally we sleep FANTASTIC ( excepting teething, growth spurts, etc). I need to wean her off because it is clear that she is over it and I think babies need that freedom of waking up in their crib and entertaining themselves and being independent little people. I am weaning her off with a method that I have not read about ( and I have read all the methods) called " Swaddle your baby till she is super asleep and then undo it" which has been semi successful. When her hands get crazy and wake her up in the night I do what I call a faux swaddle, where I take the blanket under her and tuck it over her arms and under her bum loosely, just so her arms don't get too cray. Which I also didn't read about anywhere. I feel like you kind of have to reinvent the wheel for YOUR baby, because they are all their own little sleepers. Right now she is currently asleep IN HER CRIB with her arms OUT of her swaddle so obvs I am feeling on top of the world. Little victories!
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Elsie's "I am over being a baby burrito" face
Sunday, August 17, 2014
once a year
Once a year I hate the farm.
I hate the heat.
I hate the flies.
I hate that my husband is always gone, and when he is home he is so tired he just wants to go to sleep. I hate that I am kicking it like a single mother.
I hate the dirt that gets tracked into my house.
I hate the weeds in the garden.
I hate the boxes of produce that I have to spend all day canning/drying/freezing.
These stressful blessings I have, huh? I have husband who provides for our little family so I can have my DREAM JOB, to be a momma & homemaker. I have a garden overflowing with berries and veggies of every sort, an orchard with so much fruit on the branches that it can't even hold on to them, and a beautiful home that get to live in and take care of.
Once a year I need an attitude adjustment.
I have been running on empty and mainly diet coke as I have been so sleep deprived with my favorite smooshy girl. Sometimes I hold her and she is crying, and I just cry, too.It is hard to be so tired. I have been cranky with my husband who is just as, and most days more tired than I am from working long days in the hot sun.
Today as I watched him teach Sunday school I was reminded of all the reasons I fell in love with him- underneath a layer of dirt and exhaustion is that confident, smart, witty man who happens to look very handsome in a suit and tie. I am happy he is my person. I need to be nicer to my person. He works so hard for Elsie Lou & I. As I packed up his roast beef and mashed potatoes dinner in a tupperware today, to deliver to him on a tractor my heart was filled with gratitude for him. Marriage is hard. Farm life is hard. Being a mother is hard. But I am so very blessed and so very grateful to be the farm wife.
Monday, August 11, 2014
she's 5 months
I still can't get the girl to smile for my big camera! A serious shot will have to do.
I gave in. This cutie eats a little meal of pureed food before bed, after she nurses. Dessert? She LOVES food. She must be a Goodrich. Nobody really refrained from giving her "tastes" of things since she was far too small, and I feel like she is very ready for a little something extra. She opens her mouth when I get a drink of water and pants like "me too!! please me too!!" She usually gets a sip. What am I talking about, she always gets a sip of water. You really can't resist an Elsie Lou. The best part about her little meal of solids is that rather than decreasing the amount she nurses, she actually nurses A LOT more- which is a big relief to me after her small appetite last month. She is still a little picky though, she nurses most in the evenings at night, and if I want to get a good day feed I sometimes have to carry her around while I feed her.
I attribute it to her being a genius and far too interested in the world. I know every momma thinks their baby is a gorgeous genius but this little one is really clever. I love how social and responsive she is, smiling her favorites and recognizing her daddy and other family members. He sat down next to me the other day and put his head down because he was so tired and she reaches over and puts her little hands on his face, and plays with his facial hair. It is one of the sweetest things I have ever seen. She can read short books and count to 5. KIDDING! But it won't be long, I am telling you.
She can sit up for a little bit in tri-pod position, with her hands out in front of her. She is not a fan though! She wants to stand. Her fine motor skills are getting so much better and she loves all things sparkly. Earrings, watches, she wants them. Preferably in her mouth.
She is either teething or... I have no idea. She gets to gumming things really aggressively. When she wakes up and I cuddle her she really enjoys gumming my face. Kisses? Not the most slobbery I have ever had, really.
She is still a swaddled baby. I don't make an effort to keep her in, but it's her sleep cue. She calms right down. She can sleep alright when she busts loose in the night, but she really needs it to get to sleep. She does a midnight and a 4 am feeding most nights. I am still pretty exhausted, but being her momma is so rewarding. I feel so blessed to be able to be a stay at home with her!
I can't believe how fast she is growing!! Love my little one.
Monday, July 21, 2014
4 months & a bit
Where do I start with my Elsie Lou!! She is learning new things everyday and is growing up so fast. Elsie's favorite things are reading stories with me, sitting in her bumbo with us at the dinner table like a big girl, and ROLLING!! She will not stop rolling. She will try to roll when you put her in her car seat, on the changing table, on your knees to play... rolling is her favorite. I try to hold her back right after she has eaten, because it ends up being a giant spit up fest, but the girl is strong and there isn't much stopping her. She rolled tummy to back first, but seems to have forgotten that bit. She can fully push herself up with her little arms. When she gets her legs underneath her we are going to be in trouble. The girl wants to go! She gets her little legs moving so fast. I put her toys just out of her reach like I am encouraging this or something. She likes to hold my fingers and sit up and then stand up from there. Her standing skills are impressive and she loves it, but she has no interest in sitting up. Why sit when you can stand (?).. She loves to scream like a pterodactyl ( it really is the best way to describe it) and is a sweet smiley girl. She will laugh when I kiss attack her tummy or munch her fingers (which she always tries to put in my mouth). She laughed her first real laugh the day after Elliott and I's third anniversary and I am pretty sure I teared up. It was the cutest thing!
I bought her a johnny jump up for her 4 month birthday, because EVERY baby loves a jump up, right? False. Els hated it! I thought with her love for standing/jumping in my arms she would love it. I keep trying though and she will now tolerate swaying around in it for a few minutes at a time as long as I sit there and encourage her. She loves hanging out in her k'tan with me. I discovered a new sling hold, where she is basically sitting up& criss-cross applesauce in there. I narrate what I am up to and she likes to observe the world close to mom. We go on walks around the farm and chat about what we see. She likes to watch the pigs and likes watch the cat when we feed him. I prep dinner with her in there and let her touch and smell different ingredients.
It has probably been the best bit and the hardest bit as far as mommyhood has gone for me lately. She went through a phase where she became a very picky eater and got to distracted to nurse during the day. Which means I was up 2 or 3 times a night nursing her. I tried everything. I would nurse her in her sleep, try walking around nursing her... It really stressed me out that my baby wasn't getting enough to eat. One night she was so sad but wouldn't settle to nurse so I just made up a bottle with formula and out of no where I had a bottle taker. Now she will take a pumped bottle and it has been fantastic ( and a little sad, too). We have both been under the weather the last few days, but her appetite has gotten a lot better and I couldn't be more relieved. She hasn't had her 4 month visit yet, it's tomorrow (dr. office frustrations for another post) , but when I took her in for her cough she was 14 pounds 8 oz, which I am ok with considering feeding her has been SO HARD the last month.
I have considered starting her on solids since she was struggling with nursing, but I tried and she choked a lot. I will reconsider at 5 months, but in my heart of hearts I want to exclusively breastfeed for 6 months. She shows a lot of interest in food, and grabs at plates and my spoon on it's way to my mouth : ) She loves her binky, and in the car I watch her take it out of her mouth and hold it out and an arms length and marvel at it like it's the best thing in the world. She can put it back in better now, and likes to grab it with both hands and chew on every part of it.
I am phasing out swaddling since she is a roller, and I really feel like she has outgrown it. I can rock her to sleep on my chest and then just lay her down and she sleeps just fine. I usually lay her down on my bed to fall asleep and then move her into her crib when I go to bed ( and she is oblivious).
I love my sweet girl so much and am loving watching her learn and grow!! I hope we get feeling better soon.
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I bought her a johnny jump up for her 4 month birthday, because EVERY baby loves a jump up, right? False. Els hated it! I thought with her love for standing/jumping in my arms she would love it. I keep trying though and she will now tolerate swaying around in it for a few minutes at a time as long as I sit there and encourage her. She loves hanging out in her k'tan with me. I discovered a new sling hold, where she is basically sitting up& criss-cross applesauce in there. I narrate what I am up to and she likes to observe the world close to mom. We go on walks around the farm and chat about what we see. She likes to watch the pigs and likes watch the cat when we feed him. I prep dinner with her in there and let her touch and smell different ingredients.
It has probably been the best bit and the hardest bit as far as mommyhood has gone for me lately. She went through a phase where she became a very picky eater and got to distracted to nurse during the day. Which means I was up 2 or 3 times a night nursing her. I tried everything. I would nurse her in her sleep, try walking around nursing her... It really stressed me out that my baby wasn't getting enough to eat. One night she was so sad but wouldn't settle to nurse so I just made up a bottle with formula and out of no where I had a bottle taker. Now she will take a pumped bottle and it has been fantastic ( and a little sad, too). We have both been under the weather the last few days, but her appetite has gotten a lot better and I couldn't be more relieved. She hasn't had her 4 month visit yet, it's tomorrow (dr. office frustrations for another post) , but when I took her in for her cough she was 14 pounds 8 oz, which I am ok with considering feeding her has been SO HARD the last month.
I have considered starting her on solids since she was struggling with nursing, but I tried and she choked a lot. I will reconsider at 5 months, but in my heart of hearts I want to exclusively breastfeed for 6 months. She shows a lot of interest in food, and grabs at plates and my spoon on it's way to my mouth : ) She loves her binky, and in the car I watch her take it out of her mouth and hold it out and an arms length and marvel at it like it's the best thing in the world. She can put it back in better now, and likes to grab it with both hands and chew on every part of it.
I am phasing out swaddling since she is a roller, and I really feel like she has outgrown it. I can rock her to sleep on my chest and then just lay her down and she sleeps just fine. I usually lay her down on my bed to fall asleep and then move her into her crib when I go to bed ( and she is oblivious).
I love my sweet girl so much and am loving watching her learn and grow!! I hope we get feeling better soon.
"You bring me here and you give me no sushi!?"
Tolerating the jumpy.
Chatting with momma
"All my toys, please! And wipe my face."
Putting together a soup in the crock pot
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